Chapter: 14 Understanding Sex

Teenager kissing

In this world, multicellular living organisms like human being are continuing their life cycle since thousands of years. Their existence is possible due to production of new organism from older organism of same species. Without sex this production is not possible and that organism will certainly extinct.

Similarly human being is able to continue their life cycle and its race due to sex. You can see how much is sex important biologically. But it can become too much dangerous if you take it lightly and randomly. So, in this chapter I am going to make you aware about sex especially teenage sex.

In the past the main aim of sex used to be give birth to baby. Now it is linked with pleasure due to availability of modern contraceptive devices.

In the teenage period due to hormonal production and development of sex organs for being able to produce baby, you may feel desire to have sex. So, there is chance you may indulge in teenage sex which generally occur after teenage love or sometimes without any love.

Generally, major impacts and risk of teenage sex occurs over girl. So, I will like to focus this article over girl. Here are some facts that I want you to acknowledge:

i. If you involve in teenage sex even due to teenage love you regret about it later because teenage love generally don’t last long. You may feel regret of losing virginity for the person who don’t care you. This will only make you depressed, you may lose your confidence and generally you won’t feel that much of dignity like you used to feel previously before having sex.

ii. Best way to prevent unwanted pregnancy and STDs like HIV-AIDS, syphilis, gonorrhea, herpes etc is to be away from sex. Contraceptive devices that are available today are also not 100% efficient. So, even though you adopt preventive method while having sex, you won’t be 100% safe from STDs and unwanted pregnancy.

iii. If you are a girl and if you become pregnant then can you face the bad criticism and comments of the society? Even if you managed to resist and ignore the society, it will be very hard to ignore your own feelings and thoughts of regret and self hatred. You have to face severe depression and sadness. You may not even get the support of your family at that time, when you need it the most.

iv. You may think that you can undergo abortion, which means to kill your own baby. Do you know that even the mother- animal won’t kill her own baby? Imagine how much self-hatred, regret, and problem you will face at that time? And generally underage abortion is very risky, so you may not be able to give birth to child again or breathe again after abortion.

v. If you want to give birth to the baby then next big question is how can a child can give birth to another child and take care of it? Not only you but also your child have to bear risks and your child may not be healthy. After giving birth to that child you have to commit yourself to take care and support that child for more than next 16 years. You may not be able to build your career and fulfill your many dreams. You can imagine how hard it will be to grow a child by a being single parent. Or look around the widow women and her children and observe the difficulty of their life due to lack of her husband.

vi. It don’t matter if you are a boy or girl but if you have already engaged in sex then there will be high chances that you will again engage in more sexual activity. Because after involvement in sex for the first time you will feel more confident and encouraged to involve in next time. And more you involve in such kind of teenage sex, the more you will have to face risk of STDs infection and teen pregnancy.

vii. This is the age of digital media like camera, video-camera etc. and if anyone became able to capture the photo or video of you while involving in sex and if he/she upload it over the internet then within a minutes that photo or video will be accessible through every nook and corner of the world. In such condition can you imagine what will happen to your dignity, self-respect, social status and your family’s reputation? Can you face the comments and criticism from the society? You may even be victim of cyber-bullying and black-mailing.

viii. One very important fact that you need to realize is that you don’t need to have sex with your lover to show that you love him/her. Especially for girl, if your boyfriend tries to blackmail you by saying, “If you love me then have sex with me. Otherwise I will dump you.” then in such case you should easily understand that he does not truly love you. If he had truly loved you then he would have respected your opinion and he would have happily waited to have sex until marriage. Another thing you should know is that the world is occupied by more than 7 billion people. So don’t feel sad to dump the boyfriend who doesn’t truly love you.

“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.”

-Marilyn Monroe

Realize these above mentioned facts and don’t engage in sexual activity prior to marriage. Instead you can engage in safe sexual behviour like masturbation.

Below I will like to mention a trick which can help you to control your sexual arousal or sexual imagination, if you do it in right way. For that just try to inhale air up to 10 seconds, try to store that air or stop your breathing for up to 10 seconds and finally try to exhale the air up 10 seconds. Remember that you don’t have to inhale, store or exhale the air exactly for up to 10 seconds but try to do up to how much as you can by counting the number of seconds silently inside your mind.

Repeat this process until your mind is finally diverted away from sexual arousal or imagination.

NOTE:- If the facts mentioned in this chapter matches to your personal life then I would like to apologize for it. My intention is not to hurt you but I am trying to prevent the other teenager from facing the same problem which you have faced.

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